(PHOENIX) -- Jodi Arias, who has admitted to lying about killing her ex-boyfriend Travis Alexander, even lied in her diary in the weeks after his death, according to entries obtained exclusively by ABC News.
The page of diary entries, found in court motions, was seized by police from Arias' bedroom in her grandparents' California home. The entries are dated from June 10 through June 13, 2008, days after Alexander was shot and stabbed to death on June 4. His body was found by friends on June 9.
Arias, now 32, has admitted killing Alexander, claiming it was in self defense and that Alexander, 30, was an abusive lover.
The page begins ".. that Travis is dead. What happened?!? Travis, what is this?"
The next entry is dated June 11 and said in part, "Last night was so hard... I wanted so badly to call Travis, but knowing he wouldn't answer was too much to bear. And knowing he wasn't calling me anytime soon was just killing me. I broke down as I climbed into bed and just cried and cried and cried until I fell asleep."
Testimony in her murder trial that cited her phone records showed that Arias did call Alexander four times after she killed him and as late as June 15. The first call was just hours after he died and one call lasted 16 minutes, which Verizon official Jody Citizen suggested indicated Arias was listening to Alexander's messages and possibly deleting her own messages to him.
On June 12, Arias wrote to her diary, "It just feels like he hasn't called me in too long. I hear him singing. I hear him laugh."
And in the final entry on the page, Arias wrote on June 13 that she sent 13 white irises to someone she called "Mums."
"Travis always told me he liked the name Iris for a girl...If I ever have a son I'll name him Alexander," she wrote.
The diary entries are the latest twist in the Arias investigation. Police interrogation tapes played in court over the last few days shows her adamantly denying that she traveled from her home in California to Alexander's home in Mesa, Ariz., on the day Alexander was killed.
When presented with overwhelming evidence that she was present and that she killed Alexander, she tells Detective Esteban Flores, "I'm not the brightest person but I don't think I could stab him. I think I would have to shoot him continuously until he was dead."
At another point while still insisting on her innocence, she tells Flores, "If, IF I had it in me.. [I would] make it as humane as possible... make it quick."
Alexander was stabbed 27 times, his throat was slashed and he was shot in the head.
Arias eventually admitted to Flores that she was in Mesa that day, but claimed that Alexander was killed by a masked man and woman who took her driver's license and threatened to kill her if she told anyone.
The prosecution claims that Arias killed Alexander in a jealous rage after one last tryst in which they took nude photos of each other. The assault began as Arias was taking pictures of Alexander in the shower, prosecutors claim.
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